Confession

I suck at blogging. I get inspired but don't do anything about it. But things, I'm hoping they are about to change...

Change the 'tude

Have you ever tried to inspire a group of people by simply asking them to change their attitude? Seriously, go try it.

In preparation for our upcoming recital, I told my hip hop class of 11 girls ages 9-12 years old that I needed them to be leaders at our upcoming company practice. Thinking that at least I could pull this little speech out of my back pocket when convenient I never expected them to actually take it seriously. So the next day when all 100 company members showed up hyped up on sugar, hopped up on adrenaline from the week, and full of little dancer energy, I was shocked to find them sitting quietly and doing their stretches when I arrived. I was so impressed that a 3 minute pep talk about being flexible and cooperative had impacted their actions.

Last night we had dress rehearsal at our performance space and and upon entering I could already feel my shoulders getting tight. I heard grown women yelling obscenities and making cynical remarks about all things that don't really matter. When I got on stage that attitude of my older girls (12-18 year olds) matched the heat of the lights boring down on the back of my neck. They were rude, ready to criticize each other, the production, and even me. I took it personally and hurries hastily through our practice time.

When I got home, I told Wopsle though gritted teeth the whole story. He asked me if I had given them the same talk that I gave my younger girls. "Why on earth would I have to give my older girls the same talk I gave my younger girls?" is what I wondered. Wopsle could tell my frustration and remarked that it sounded like even the oldest girls, the women, the MOMS! even needed this talk. WOW! We all need to be reminded to check our attitudes sometime, no matter what our age. There are some situations that we cannot control but that our complaining, whining, and fit throwing will do nothing to help.

Phil 2:12-14
"12Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, 13for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. 14Do everything without complaining or arguing, 15so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault..."

Changing

Recently I had the pleasure of hearing The Pioneer Woman speak. She talked about the different hats that she wears, among other hilarious things, and spoke about how she feels like blogging is so organic for her and that it is something that she truly loves to do. I use to think that writing was something that I loved to do and that therefore blogging would be easy for me to take on also. Notsomuch. Although I do love sharing certain aspects of my life, I would much rather read about other people's wild adventures or even mundane observations. I live a much simpler life now, sue me. This thought of loving writing did make me think about how I feel like ministry is that organic thing that I love to do.

I also recently attended a Beth Moore (lerve her) simulcast and she made the comment that her Scripture memory was changing her life right now. Although this statement was just a transitional story unrelated to her main point, I was totally stuck on that statement. And it wasn't the fact that she was memorizing Scripture that I was amazed with (although I am blown away when people can do this too). Rather I was fixated on the fact that she said that it was "changing her life." Like changing as in the current process of, an active occurrence in her life. I feel like so often we focus on the "change" that occurs when Christ comes into our lives but do little to acknowledge the fact that each day His mercies and grace are new and offer change and renewal every minute.

That said, I am changing and growing and I want to acknowledge this. I also want to do something that actively "changes my life every day." I have a friend who loves to take photos and has started a 365 days in photo journal on Facebook. How fun, but what a commitment. All I can think is how miserably I would fail when I would inevitably look up on day 3 and realize that I had neglected day 2 already. I found a 365 days in Scripture website and this was the Scripture for today:

Matt 6:22 - "If, then, your eye is simple, your whole body will be bright."

This is going to be an interesting journey I'm going to continue on...

A Fresh Start

I started my job last week. As cheesy as it sounds, I'm so happy to have realized one of my dreams. Something that I have wanted to do for a long long time I can say that I'm there. Livin' the dream! And do you know what? I love it! Through all the torture that was cosmetology school - the wackos, the poor grammar, the relentless days of working on a mannequin - it was all worth it the first time someone put money in my hand and thanked me for how special I had made them feel.

That's my mission now. To serve others through making them feel beautiful. I truly want my clients to know that when they sit in my chair, I am totally invested in their well-being. In fact, I want to come up with a slogan, or mission statement, or set of values and have it framed and displayed at my station.

I know I want the words "serving" and "beautiful" but I need it to roll off the tongue better. Any ideas?

Grammy

Every day I remember my Grammy and the things that she taught me that meant the most. Today as I write my Christmas thank-you cards I will remember that she taught me how to give thanks. She led by example in writing thank you notes for each gift, card, or blessing ever sent her way often sending thank you cards for thank you cards. She was a remarkable lady and today I'm thankful for the blessing she was and will continue to be for what she taught me.

She always said these three things:

ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING

STAND UP STRAIGHT

REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE

I love you Grammy and I miss you each day.

New Year, no promises

Yes it's a new year and if I refer back to my last year's resolution post I will undoubtedly be depressed and will cancel this blog altogether. So I won't look at what I haven't done but at what I am going to do. I just needed a little justification to get started.

I finished reading A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller just before New Year's Eve. It started off slow but I like Miller's style of writing so i was enticed to keep reading. In fact the first half of the book left me wondering what this guy was even writing about. Looking back, the entire book came full circle in describing a journey, or rather, a story. A wonderful piece of work in and of itself. I admire that greatly.

The second half of the book was captivating and left me wondering if I could ever have adventures like that. Some of the stories seemed unbelievable. Some were gut-wrenching. Some left me angry at myself and those whom I've felt abandoned by. All of them though left me asking myself what kind of stories I was partaking in.

After watching The Blindside I felt thankful that God has given me a heart to love and serve others. I strive to do that in everything that I do. I recently evaluated the activities that I'm involved in and, as humbly as I can say it, I feel like service is one of my greatest gifts. I love what I'm able to do, but I want to do more, for people, and for the world. I don't even want to be known for it but if I can improve how students love Jesus, their parents and their friends on a global scale then I've got something. If I can encourage young girls to dance with excellence and use the art of movement for good and to overcome the stigma of teen image, then great. If I can make people feel beautiful by giving them just a little bit of hope and encouragement through The Hope Portrait, then wow, what an honor it will be to serve God by serving his people.

More than anything, through The Blindside and A Million Miles in a Thousand Years I've realized that people are what matter and that there are people in need. Miller talks about going on "practice stories" and even though at the end of the day I can barely make it to bed, I intend on going on even more "practice stories" this year. Big things with big dreams and big expectations. Not for more notches on my belt, or pats on the back, or even a "well done good and faithful servant" in heaven, but for Jesus and for his people.

No, we're not having kids yet.

I was very offended today when two separate people questioned me about having kids. Neither of these people really know me well so I can't be too upset with them, but it's the principle of the matter that just seems downright rude to me. One girl asked me about when we were thinking about having kids and after telling her my reasoning she said, "Well, you're days are numbered since you are 25." TWENTY FIVE!!!! When did this become past-due baby having age?! Last I checked 25 did not mean that your days were numbered for the having of the babies.

Oh, just wait, the next one was worse.

Another girl that I go to school with pulled me aside and asked if ::GET THIS:: I was having some marital problems. I responded with an emphatic no but I could tell by the look on her face that she didn't believe me. When I asked why she would think such a thing she said it was because we had been married "so long" without having any kids. Well excuuuuuuuse me! I guess that since I didn't have a baby at 17, that automatically means I'm having marital problems. Because I didn't have a baby and thennnnn get married, it means that my marriage is failing. Because I'm completely happy with my wonderful husband and best friend, doing youth ministry, living in a rent house, training a new puppy, loving my life, that suddenly qualifies me as a divorcee. Humph! I couldn't believe the nerve! That is such a sensitive subject for so many people, I mean, what if I had like a bum ovary or something?!

I do look forward to building a family....one day. I wanna know what you think: Is it ever okay to ask someone about their plans to start a family?